"Dung For", Way to Die #314, is the first death featured in "The Lighter Side of Death", which aired on March 1, 2009.
Plot[]
Farmer John, who was equal parts dumb and ugly, was working on his farm. His farmhand, Chester, was in awe of his boss' daughter, Daisy. All Chester wanted to do was plant his seed into Daisy, so the two sneak off in the hay bales, however, the horses give them away and an angry John chases Chester as Daisy watches on. Chester ducks into a truck and loses John, but is crushed to death by a stinky payload of manure. As Daisy opens the truck door, Chester's lifeless arm appears and she screams, then whines, "Why does this always happen to me?"
Transcript[]
([] is playing, Daisy is waiting for someone)
Narrator: Did you hear the one of after farmer's daughter?
(Boing, the horse neighs)
Narrator: You never heard this one.
(The antagonist is introduced, Epic Death is playing)
Narrator: Meet farmer John. He's mean, dumb and ugly. This is his daughter, Daisy. She's sweet and smoke 'n hot.
(Daisy's lover is shown)
Narrator: And this is Chester. The hired hand. He's looking to get a leg up... on Daisy.
(Chester & Daisy are in the hay bales, start making out)
Narrator: If farmer John knew anything at all, it was animal husband. All he wanted was keep the animals from husbanding his daughter. But when he heard a roguish behind hay bales, he knew his Daisy, was about to get planted.
-Daisy: (Squeaks of joy)
-Chester: Oh yeah, Daisy. Oh, Daisy!
John: HEY!!!
Chester: Oh, no!
(Chester runs away from John, the cartoonish chase begins, [] is playing)
Daisy: (Screams)
Narrator: The chase was on. Chester was about to go from stud to guilty.
(John searches for Chester, Chester hides behind the opened the gate, runs away from John, Daisy waits for Chester)
Narrator: Daisy was sad, because she lost her mouth.
(Chester hides into the truck, nearly being found by John, John bangs the fork to the truck gate, goes away, Chester sniffs the dirt but turns out it was manure)
Chester: Oh, (s*** but censored by a cow mooing)!
(Gets worse, a loader gets near the truck, [] is adding, Chester looks up)
Chester: Oh... Oh, no! Aaaah...!
(The loader throws the manure on the truck, crushes Chester)
Chester: Oooooohh...! Aaaaah...!
(Daisy walks towards the truck, checks Chester's situation, when opens, Chester was dead)
Daisy: (Screams of horror) (Freaks)
(Andrew Kubiszewski's pilot score is playing)
Dr. Khyber Zaffarkhan: This entirely possible that he died...from crush injury. Suffered from... the huge amount of manure.
(Replay of Chester being crushed by manure from the loader)
Dr. Khyber Zaffarkhan: The methane gas that produce from the manure in truck, could have displace the oxygen that we would normally... needed to breathe in...
(Innocent Death is playing)
Narrator: Chester paid the ultimate price for trying to fertilize Daisy.
Daisy: (Whines) Why does this always happen to me?
Narrator: Poor Daisy. All she really wanted was a stable relationship.
(Horse neighs)
Cast and Interviewees[]
- Chris Harper - Chester (Lead; Intended victim)
- Christine Mulhern - Daisy (Lead)
- David Hernandez - Farmer John (Lead)
- Dr. Khyber Zaffarkhan - Physical Medicine & Rehab
Trivia[]
- The death is similar to Constriction Accident.
- The actor who played Farmer John appears in Squirreled Away as a customer.
Segment Nickname[]
- S*** Happens
Foreign Names[]
- Cubierto de Estiércol (Covered with Dung) - Latin American Spanish dub
- Fertilizado (Fertilized) - Spanish dub
- Al Estiércol (To Dung) - Mexican Spanish dub
"Oh No!"