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"Coffin Nailed", Way to Die #150, is the fourth death to be featured in "Up With Death", which aired on December 16, 2009.

Plot[]

Mason never had a steady job until he got one with the county morgue. He loved his job knowing that he has a fetish to have sex with dead women. In other words, he is a necrophile. On the day of the funeral for his latest stiffie, Mason drives on his way to the funeral home. The problem is, Mason mistakenly forgot to lock the wheels of the gurney holding the casket. Late for the funeral, Mason takes a shortcut through a parking lot and when a car comes out in front of him, Mason quickly slams on the van's brakes. Mason avoided colliding with the other driver, but not the casket colliding with him; the accident causes the casket to fling forward and hit him in the back of the head, severing his brainstem, pushing him through the windshield and slicing up his skin; following his loss of consciousness, Mason died seconds later as he goes to hell.

Transcript[]

([] begins playing)

Narrator: Mason wound up becoming the thing he craved most; a cold and lifeless corpse.

(Recap of Mason humming Chopin's Funeral March)

Narrator: Go to Hell, you freak.

Trivia[]

  • This death actually happened on January 13, 1989. Jack Volkering, 59, of Fort Wright, was returning from a funeral Mass on Wednesday when a car driven by Lonnie Stephens, 23, of Bellevue crossed the road and struck the hearse. The casket broke through a metal holding post and struck Volkering in the back as the dashboard and steering wheel hit him in the chest. You can read about it here.
    • This death is loosely based off on Marciana Silva Barcelos, except she wasn't a pervert like Mason. On November 11th, 2008 in Rio Grande do Sul, Brazil - Barcelos, 67, was a passenger in the hearse carrying the body of her husband, Josi Silveira Coimbra, who had died the day before. Suddenly, a speeding Alfa Romeo car struck the back of the hearse. Dislodged by the accident, Josi’s coffin hurtled forward and smashed into the back of Marciana’s neck, killing her instantly. You can read about it here.
  • If one can notice something in the beginning of the story, while Mason's van drives by, a random person walks on the sidewalk.
  • In 1982 this happened to a French mortician.
  • Henry Taylor was killed the same way.

Cast and interviewees[]

  • Pierson Ryan - Mason (lead:intended victim)
  • Lizzie Marisson - Deceased Blonde Girl
  • Alex Katehakis - Psychotherapist
  • Dr. S. Thomas Carmichael - Neurologist

Goofs[]

  • Anachronism: Despite this segment being set in 1989, the cars (including the Ford E250, which generation in the segment was created in 1992) are recent models thus completely inconsistent for the time period this skit is set in (likely to match the date of the real-life equivalent of this segment).
  • Crew or Equipment Visible: As we're given the aftermath of Mason's demise, the cameraman is reflected on the van.

Segment Nicknames[]

  • Casket Nailed

Foreign names[]

  • Ataúd Asesino (Killer Coffin) - Latin American Spanish dub
  • Jodido por el Ataúd (F****d by the Coffin) - Spanish dub
  • Eingesargt (Put in the Coffin) - German dub
  • Kanihanag Molestan Korpos ka nitkay Kofina (Molesting Corpse Underestimates the Coffin) - Lazoran dub

Gallery[]

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