Enter the Ferret
"1000 Ways to Die" Episode 67.
Originally aired March 12, 2012.
Title reference: A ferret-related event in this episode (See "Way to Die #780").
-- This is the Original Episode --
Way to Die #780
On January 18, 2004, in Richmond, VA. A Scottish man in a ferret legging contest attempts to break the world record for the longest time a ferret has been in his pants. However, one of the ferrets finds its way into the man's rectum and feasts on his hemorrhoids, causing death from excessive bleeding.
Alt names - Ferret In The Hole
Note: This segment is otherwise known as "Frantic Ferret"
Way to Die #141
On October 5, 2002, in Omaha, NE. A drunk, obese man bets his buddies that he can get into a baby swing at a playground. After he strips naked and lubes himself up, he squeezes into the swing, but gets stuck and his buddies leave him in the swing for the night. The man tries to scream for help, but no one comes to his aid. Due to how extremely tight the baby swing is around his waist, the man dies from sepsis due to a ruptured appendix.
Alt names - Morbidly Deceased
Note: This segment is otherwise known as "Heavyweight Havoc"
Way to Die #128
On September 5, 2009, in Racine, WI. A female boxer uses diuretics to dehydrate herself so she can make bantamweight. When she disqualifies herself for using an illegal move, she hits herself in the head from frustration and ends up dying due to her dehydration shrinking her brain and the force of the punch causing it to rattle and bleed.
Alt names - KO'd
Way to Die #216
On March 15, 2010, in Tarzana, CA. A group of stoned teenagers in a park decide to mess around by putting one of the back tire of one of the teen's motorcycles against the base of the carousel, getting on, and revving the bike up to create a large centrifugal force on the merry-go-round. With the carousel rotating at an extreme speed, the one of the teens flies off and his brain stem is impaled orally on a horseshoes pole sticking out from the sandbox nearby.
Alt names - Merry Go-Wrong
Way to Die #613
On June 19, 2001, in Chicago, IL. A cemetery owner digs up his corpses and dissolves them in hydrofluoric acid to make room in the plots and coffins to put them up for resale. After his coworkers refuse to go along with his plan, the cemetery owner decides to do it himself and ends up falling into the acid tub, burning himself to death from the inside out.
Alt names - Acid Washed
Note: This segment is otherwise known as "Graveyard Shift"
Trivia: This segment has also been used for "Top 100 Deaths".
Way to Die #99
On May 30, 2002, in Philadelphia, PA. A philly cheesesteak stand owner is rivaled by another cheesesteak owner. The two attempt to steal customers at a street art fair by lowering prices, and then the battle escalates to a food fight. When that gets out of hand, the first one creates a Molotov cocktail to use against the rival stand. The man accidentally sets his arm on fire and runs into what he thinks is a tunnel, but is actually a brick wall decorated in 3D chalk art. The force cracks his skull and kills him.
Alt names - Door to Nowhere
Way to Die #985
On August 2, 2001, in Denver, CO. A conceited tattoo artist attempting to outdo his coworkers' spiked tongue gets an extreme piercing known as "The Chainus" in which a chain goes into his mouth and out his rectum. While the other coworkers crow over the new piercing, an angry biker gang leader bursts in in pursuit of the conceited tattoo artist for tattooing Chinese language symbols on his arm that translate to "douche bag". The tattoo artist manages to escape the wrath of the biker, but ends up getting his piercing caught in a forklift. The forklift operator lifts the boxes, which causes the chain to straighten and tighten within the tattoo artist's body and causes fatal internal bleeding, killing him within seconds.
Alt names - Shredded Zeke
Visit the 1000 Ways to Die website at: www.spike.com/shows/1000-ways-to-die.
JamesTherHAMPMaster 16:33, January 29, 2013 (UTC)